10 Examples of Powerful Coaching Questions
Photo by ERIKA CRISTINA
A coach’s job can be understood as helping you to better understand where you are in life at the present moment, to develop your vision for a meaningful life, and to support you in navigate from where you are today, to your vision for an ideal tomorrow.
One of the biggest ways in which a coach support clients in uncovering these insights is by asking questions.
Questions come in many different forms and flavors, and no one question is ideal for every context, but to give you a sense of some of the questions a coach may ask, here are a couple different situational examples of some powerful coaching questions.
10 examples of powerful coaching questions
Changing focus when stuck, to tap into the power of the bigger picture
Oftentimes, we tend to get overly stuck in a problem or storyline that makes us feel stuck in the present, with no idea of how we can navigate to the future we desperately want to reach. In this mode, we are trapped in an endless maze of dead-ends; no matter where we turn, we can’t find a way forward. Here are 5 questions that can help a client who is having difficulty figuring out what next step they can take to break out of this stuck mental pattern and engage their stronger creative thinking muscles, by shifting their mind from the micro view, to the macro view.
10 years from now, what will you think about this moment?
How important is this in the grand scheme?
Imagine you are on a mountain gazing down on the valley of the present moment. What do you see from that vantage point?
From the vantage of the grand scheme or long-term view, many of the problems or limiting beliefs that we may feel are the most important and burning issues of our lives tend to melt away. In the bigger picture view, what is left is the deeper and most meaningful structure of our lives, that is unaffected by the weather of an individual day. Like standing on top of a mountain gazing down at the valley below, we can’t even see the minutiae, nor do we wish to; we see the beauty of the whole forest, not only the trees, and this moment of clear, expansive thinking can grant us a measure of wisdom that is otherwise. overwhelmed in the frenzy of our day-to-day thoughts.
How does this relate to your life vision / values?
Over time, one of the most important guiding principles that we must decide on is our personal values. Without knowing what our core values are, we are easily caught up chasing the shiny objects and momentary stimulation in the same way that everyone else around us does, without really knowing why or if it will make us happy. Unless we consciously relate what we choose to do/deal with each day/week/month to our core values, we will continue spending our time focusing on the endless aspects of our lives that are convenient, stressful, or stimulating, which leaves no space to focus on the aspects that can actually make us feel truly fulfilled.
What would it feel like for you to let go of this?
A role that coaches play is giving clients permission to temporarily let go of their struggles or problems, which they can find impossible to do themselves. Yet, letting go of the problems of the present for even a brief moment can unlock the creative energy that is trapped within us, by holding onto our stuck perspectives.
Breaking out of an either-or rock/hard place decision
One of the most challenging stuck narratives that coaches can help clients to navigate is the either-or, rock and a hard place decision. Reducing our options to 2 is an intelligent automation done by our brain, in order to reduce the amount of energy required in processing a decision. When we are deciding between two sandwiches at the lunch counter, it is useful to narrow the choices down to two, rather than considering all 12 options; however, this method is also quite prone to backfiring when it comes to abstract decision-making.
When we have a decision to make that is abstract, the brain’s automatic option-reducing convergent thinking habit can actually become quite harmful and counter-productive, if we haven’t given ourselves sufficient time to be creative and divergent. Rarely is an abstract life decision as simple as choosing either the ham or chicken sandwich, or the consequences as trivial. When it comes to tough abstract decisions, the best thing for us to do is first engage our natural creativity to explore many different options, before narrowing and selecting the optimal path forward. Yet, we can quite easily be caught in the trap that there are only 2 options available to us.
These questions can help bypass the brain’s option-reduction automation, and allow us to tap into the space in our brains that is quite creative and capable of mapping the best route for us to take.
What’s the third option here?
If you were to advise a friend in this situation, what would you say?
Which of these would create the bigger relief/value?
Sell me on each option. Now, which would you choose if you were me?
Talk me through what you need to do to confirm which decision to make.
This fifth one is not actually a question, but provides an example of how not all valuable prompts must take the form of a question.
A coach’s work doesn’t end with questions
The initial question is not where a coach’s work is done. Asking follow-up questions or prompting clients to expand on what they outline is also very important. It is also essential for a coach to align on a specific action, lock in the client’s commitment to that action, and help to set up an accountability or structure to empower the client to actually do the committed action. In this way, coaches empower client to convert the wisdom and motivation gained by contemplating powerful questions into actual changes or realization shifts, which can then take root in the client’s life and lead the client to meaningful new directions and outcomes.
That’s all for today – thanks for reading! Learn more about how working with a personal development coach can help you to live a more fulfilling life, sign up for my newsletter, and stay tuned for more self-discovery essays!